Brain Pickings - check it out

This isn't sponsored content, just something I think very highly of.  So first and foremost, go to Brain Pickings and subscribe for the weekly newsletter.  If you don't like it, you can opt-out.  I've been receiving it for a few years and it's a worthwhile read.

This is from their 9th anniversary. I say 'they' but Brain Pickings is really just Maria Popova, a one-woman source of inspiring stuff that is both recent and historically relevant in writings and art.

This list of nine reflections is fairly self explanatory, and exceptionally interesting.. (Text from here is verbatim)...

As Brain Pickings turns nine, I continue to stand by these seven reflections, but the time has come to add two more. (Nine is also an excellent numeral – an exponential factorial, the number of Muses in Greek mythology, my favorite chapter in Alice in Wonderland.) Here are the original seven, as they appeared in 2013:

1. Allow yourself the uncomfortable luxury of changing your mind. Cultivate that capacity for "negative capability." We live in a culture where one of the greatest social disgraces is not having an opinion, so we often form our "opinions" based on superficial impressions or the borrowed ideas of others, without investing the time and thought that cultivating true conviction necessitates. We then go around asserting these donned opinions and clinging to them as anchors to our own reality. It's enormously disorienting to simply say, "I don't know." But it's infinitely more rewarding to understand than to be right – even if that means changing your mind about a topic, an ideology, or, above all, yourself.

2. Do nothing for prestige or status or money or approval alone. As Paul Graham observed, "prestige is like a powerful magnet that warps even your beliefs about what you enjoy. It causes you to work not on what you like, but what you’d like to like." Those extrinsic motivators are fine and can feel life-affirming in the moment, but they ultimately don't make it thrilling to get up in the morning and gratifying to go to sleep at night – and, in fact, they can often distract and detract from the things that do offer those deeper rewards.

3. Be generous. Be generous with your time and your resources and with giving credit and, especially, with your words. It's so much easier to be a critic than a celebrator. Always remember there is a human being on the other end of every exchange and behind every cultural artifact being critiqued. To understand and be understood, those are among life's greatest gifts, and every interaction is an opportunity to exchange them.

4. Build pockets of stillness into your life. Meditate. Go for walks. Ride your bike going nowhere in particular. There is a creative purpose to daydreaming, even to boredom. The best ideas come to us when we stop actively trying to coax the muse into manifesting and let the fragments of experience float around our unconscious mind in order to click into new combinations. Without this essential stage of unconscious processing, the entire flow of the creative process is broken.

Most importantly, sleep. Besides being the greatest creative aphrodisiac, sleep also affects our every waking moment, dictates our social rhythm, and even mediates our negative moods. Be as religious and disciplined about your sleep as you are about your work. We tend to wear our ability to get by on little sleep as some sort of badge of honor that validates our work ethic. But what it really is is a profound failure of self-respect and of priorities. What could possibly be more important than your health and your sanity, from which all else springs?

5. When people tell you who they are, Maya Angelou famously advised, believe them. Just as importantly, however, when people try to tell you who you are, don't believe them. You are the only custodian of your own integrity, and the assumptions made by those that misunderstand who you are and what you stand for reveal a great deal about them and absolutely nothing about you.

6. Presence is far more intricate and rewarding an art than productivity. Ours is a culture that measures our worth as human beings by our efficiency, our earnings, our ability to perform this or that. The cult of productivity has its place, but worshipping at its altar daily robs us of the very capacity for joy and wonder that makes life worth living – for, as Annie Dillard memorably put it, "how we spend our days is, of course, how we spend our lives."

7. "Expect anything worthwhile to take a long time." This is borrowed from the wise and wonderful Debbie Millman, for it's hard to better capture something so fundamental yet so impatiently overlooked in our culture of immediacy. The myth of the overnight success is just that – a myth – as well as a reminder that our present definition of success needs serious retuning. As I've reflected elsewhere, the flower doesn’t go from bud to blossom in one spritely burst and yet, as a culture, we're disinterested in the tedium of the blossoming. But that’s where all the real magic unfolds in the making of one’s character and destiny.

And here are the two new additions:

8. Seek out what magnifies your spirit. Patti Smith, in discussing William Blake and her creative influences, talks about writers and artists who magnified her spirit – it's a beautiful phrase and a beautiful notion. Who are the people, ideas, and books that magnify your spirit? Find them, hold on to them, and visit them often. Use them not only as a remedy once spiritual malaise has already infected your vitality but as a vaccine administered while you are healthy to protect your radiance.

9. Don't be afraid to be an idealist. There is much to be said for our responsibility as creators and consumers of that constant dynamic interaction we call culture – which side of the fault line between catering and creating are we to stand on? The commercial enterprise is conditioning us to believe that the road to success is paved with catering to existing demands – give the people cat GIFs, the narrative goes, because cat GIFs are what the people want. But E.B. White, one of our last great idealists, was eternally right when he asserted half a century ago that the role of the writer is "to lift people up, not lower them down" – a role each of us is called to with increasing urgency, whatever cog we may be in the machinery of society. Supply creates its own demand. Only by consistently supplying it can we hope to increase the demand for the substantive over the superficial – in our individual lives and in the collective dream called culture.

As I said above, go to Brain Pickings and subscribe for the weekly newsletter.  You will appreciate it, I promise.

S.

Success by Any Measure

I successfully ran my first marathon today, and I feel tremendous about it.  Except perhaps for some general fatigue and the fact my legs are beyond stiff and sore.  But that's the bounty I earned today and I'm even relishing that.

I enjoyed the effort - ok, not all the effort as it was really cold - but that was secondary to how I felt. I learned a number of things about myself this weekend, this summer really, and I'll share them as I'd like to encourage you to reach outside your own comfort zone to get the same insights into yourself.

First off, let me say I'm not a natural runner. You know those lithe people that seem to glide over the ground and don't sweat when moving along - reincarnated gazelles or something like that. Well, I'm not one of those, so running is lots of work for me, as it is for many others.  I have to push for every step.  With that in mind here's a few things I learned today:

1. I can keep pushing myself - through pain, discomfort and even the tedium of long practice runs.  That tells me I can do that in other parts of my life too.
2. I never thought about quitting, in fact there was never a question of it. I took 4hours and 50mins today in 3-6 degrees celsius and I sang out loud through the last 40mins. Doubt trips us up, and while it takes more than a positive attitude to succeed, it's always good to have.
3. I ran with 2 other incredible people for the first 28kms, and we joked and laughed.  Humour and camaraderie and shared suffering help me outside of my head and I've got great memories of our time together today as a result. 
4. I drew energy from the crowds that were positive, supportive and all over.  I was never alone. I 'high-fived' little kids and countless strangers and it meant a huge amount to me that they were there. Never forget your cheering section as they are a powerful motivating force.
5. A running support visit from my wife in the last 1.5kms totally revved me up. I tripled my speed and had energy to spare.  Her conscious effort to come to where I was allowed me to access an energy source I didn't know I had.  Love and support is incredible to help us achieve what we might think is beyond our abilities.

As I sit here at the end of this day, still humming from the work involved and a general glow of accomplishment, I do have to wonder a little.  While I hadn't ever intended to run a marathon, I found it to be a unique test and I'm very glad to have done it.  I understand enough about myself that I was willing to try and fail - to have quit, and thrown in the towel that I couldn't do it. And I did it anyway, aiming for success, but knowing I could reach my own breaking point. The knowledge that it would have been ok to fail was strangely free-ing, it was no longer an option once I had de-fanged it. That is probably the most important thing I learned today on that long straight road. 

To Dare Greatly and Fail

I'm a fan of Brene Brown and her popularization of Teddy Roosevelt's 1923 Speech, where he captures the idea of daring greatly..
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.

Brene Brown wrote a book and arguably started a movement about this, and there's a specific idea in here I really admire: The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again..and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.  To put yourself out there, and try knowing you may well fail - that's a romantic concept I appreciate - it's the seeds of greatness.  I grew up on the philosophy of Yoda - "There is no try, there is only do, or do not" and I think the little green guy was wrong here actually.  You have to try, and take the leap sometimes. At worst you fail, but then the very act of trying was still worth doing, because it's important to understand enough about yourself that you're willing to fail - and have tried nonetheless.

Marathon

"Whether you think you can, or you can't, you're probably right" 

- Henry Ford

You probably know the story of the first famous long distance runner who delivered a message of battle success against the Persians, and raced from Marathon to Athens, running all 26miles / 42kilometers.   And then promptly died on the spot. Happily mortality rates from marathons have dramatically improved since then, but they are still held as a true test of fitness and stamina.

My own first marathon is in a week, and I'm finding that Mr. Ford's observation rings true. While it's a run, the reality of the effort is that it'll be done mostly between my ears. Running a marathon will take somewhere between 3.5 and 5 hours  - I'm not Kenyan - and in that time there will be emotional highs and lows. Dealing with fatigue, various types of pain and watching others both pass me, and crumble by the road-side will be a fascinating experience.  Having done a number of half marathons, I expect it to be a larger, more evocative day, but not new.

You see in many ways, the marathon is going to be an anti-climax to the whole effort that began months ago when a coupe of us elected to try for the marathon.  A structured four month preparation program began then, and it was undertaken because none of us underestimated what this would take. We've run long, we ran in high heat, we ran in the rain.  We ran and ran and ran, and then ran again the next day.  Long slow practices had us go well north of 30kms, and there was a long time period when every run was a new personal distance record.  It got to the point when doing 'only' a half marathon felt like an easy day.  Distance blends, and you share in each other's resolve and challenges alike.  I know I've run close to 600kms since May, so in that sense, another 42 ought to be easy.  Or maybe not.

Whichever way next week goes, I'll know I can do it, I know that I'm able to do it.  Because regardless what happens in the spandex and nike-clad throngs that will fill the race course next week, I did it on empty back roads over the course of this long summer, when the motivation didn't come in the form of timing chips, finishing medals and cheering crowds - it came from within and knowledge that the commitment to do hard things is really all it takes.

Heroes

Hero's as in "who is yours?" has been on my mind of late.  As kids we're often asked this question, but not so much as adults.  Which is a shame really, as heroes have a real aspirational benefit for each of us I believe.  If your hero is still "Superman" then that's ok, but I think I have a slightly different point to make.

A hero is someone you look up to, someone you want to emulate, and aspire to be more like.  It makes sense when we're kids to look at real or imaginary adults, but as we grow older do you look up to a moral leader, a capabilities leader, a spiritual guide or perhaps a sports or business icon.  Everyone can make their own choices here of course, though I'd suggest it does tell us a little about the person to understand who their own hero is.

I'd like to make an alternative suggestion to our hero choices, and that's the you should aim to be your own hero.  We may all be average people (somebody has to be), but aiming to impress yourself, to really think highly of something you've been able to do, or are challenging yourself to do - let's all aim for heroism from ourselves.  There is no one more important to try to impress.