Christmas Thoughts

I live quite close to a nondescript building with an innocuous name that is a shelter for North American priests that are in rehabilitation from various infractions.  I think you know what I mean by 'infractions'.  They aren't confined, that would be a jail, but rather my understanding (and I may well be wrong here), is that it's a rehabilitation centre, a place where other professionals work with them to help them back to their chosen path.  It's top of mind to me as I quite frequently see them walking the area, to get air, clear their heads no doubt and consider themselves.  They don't walk as priests, in fact they look homeless, which in a sense they are.

Over the weeks, I come to recognize some of them as I pass by in my car, on the area paths.  As I also like to walk in the woods (and tend to do that alone, sans dog as I enjoy nature), I often think I might be considered a way-ward priest by the neighbours and passers-by.  But I don't think the area I live in generally acknowledges this centre, or that purpose or their local presence as it's a secret like so much of Catholicism.  So perhaps not.

There's a popular struggle between those with faith at this time of the year, the 'true meaning of Christmas' and the commercialism that's overtaken everything as we're primarily viewed in society as consumers, not individuals.  Democracy isn't at risk from socialism or communism, it's being insidiously eroded by capitalism, and we've yet to acknowledge that.  Seeing these older men walk around, I wonder what their view of Christmas is.  Normally they'd be front-line soldiers for the spiritual side of the argument, but that commitment has got to have taken a kick-in-the-teeth in light of their personal circumstances.   While I have very little personal compassion for them in light of their actions and the trusts they betrayed, I do pity them right now.  Their path back to normalcy must seem unattainable - once a traitor, always a traitor to your country, your ideals or your faith.

Christmas is a hard time of year for many.

Part#2 - An Enroute Direction Change

I’m gonna tack a little here folks. I was going to offer a same old, same old travelogue of what my week was like. Maybe pop a few pics in too. You know, normal stuff. In fact I had every intention of doing that while away, posting from various exotic spots. But I began to hesitate as I asked myself the question aloud, who is that for?

The answer made me uncomfortable about myself. And so I didn’t follow convention and instead thought about my motivation and why I share this.

So here’s a more honest story of the past week. I've no idea if you’ll like it (as much) but it’s my story, so read on - or don't.

I started planning this idea of blowing some long accumulated frequent flier miles on something “interesting” a while back. In concert with that, I’ve been reading a couple travel FQTV points guru-guys blogs for a while, so I developed an awareness of some unique travel situations. In truth, I was seduced (as we can all be) by the idea of super-luxury first class experiences out there, that are accessible if “you know where they are”. So I looked at travel as a means to an end, not to get somewhere, which in itself made me a little unique in the sense that others around me were going place to place to place and I was there for the experience.

There's something that I feel a little vulnerable admitting here about myself, but that I think might be cathartic.  When one travels around in business/first class on flights, fancy airline lounges and suites in 5* hotels - and generally enjoys the finer things in life that money can buy - it's easy to persuade yourself that you're doing well.  People wait on you hand and foot, and it's a little vacation from the reality and varying degrees of the shit in your life.  I engaged this facade with about $240 in airfare taxes and some FQTV miles as I wanted that vacation from reality. The escape itself justified the planning and the motivating factor for me - the fact I'd travel around the globe was a nice bonus.

I had a deeper motivation. My own business is struggling for some traction and while there are good things coming up work-wise, I had too much time on my hands, and was anxious to change my own scenery. The holiday week in the US meant I knew nothing would happen work-wise, so a superficial desire met an ideal opportunity and hence the trip was born.   Many people trick themselves that 'stuff' can replace real connections, but I'm both saddened and a tad ashamed that I can also do that with experiences too.  I was teased as a kid that I acted as "Richie Rich" (look it up), and it's a badge of shame I wear that it's easy for me to get lost in the bullshit that money offers. I despise the label.

So I decided to circle the world, and spent some time in Hong Kong, Doha and Muscat. I had some specific airline experiences I wanted to try on the ground and in the air and managed to arrange those. The trip was all done in great comfort and was effectively nothing $ wise in airfare. Not bad as an escape and in hindsight the best parts weren't the champagne or  luxury - it was the exploring, a good book I read and the couple interesting people I met.

I knew I needed to get out, but when I left, when I wrote chapter #1, I didn’t acknowledge what I was doing.  I'd apologize for that, except this is written mostly for me, so my regret is that I wasn't straight up from the start.  So there's no pics, no travelogue as I/we don't deserve these.  I've travelled enough honestly, in the dirt, and with real experiences to know this past week wasn't real.